Question: Are women writers as capable of naked and shameless sex writing as they are of naked and shameless bids for attention?

I am currently in search of the bold and the beautiful writer. One who will drop a post so ecstatic that it will leave the masses swaying! That female blogger with balls and a colossal writer’s ego in terms of content. I am in search of a female blogger who can tell it like it is, whether Xrated or not, without the shivers of being watched… The sorts of “what will they think of me? Does this post look female enough? Did I outdo myself there?” Currently there are only countable blogs run by females I know that do not give a mud of what you might or might not think of their writing. @AkelLove’s is one. @Nittzsah’s is another. These women are as bold as they can get. They stand in front of you naked, not overridden or obscured by cliché female emotion. Unfortunately, many of us female writers write as though we are afraid that our words and our assertiveness in them might tear our screens apart. We vacillate a lot. I know numerous things that I would love to write about…but I am always hesitant. This is understandable, given that we write for a mass that has refused to draw a line between the author and the work.

Yesterday, @Nittzsah, @shiku_k and I found ourselves indulged in a conversation, trying to understand the difference between these two bloggers: Sue of Nairobi Nights and Galis of Zegztales. It started with a question as to who between the two is whore enough. A lot was said, but one thing stood apparent: there is writing that can be termed as female writing. This one has no balls in it. It quivers, not by the choice of words it chooses to use, but by the selection of escapades it chooses to account. Most female bloggers will often swerve from one me-and-my-girls to another me-and-my-girls subject, with a little bit of vanilla milkshake in it. Most are afraid of tackling real issues. But those issues are not what I am interested in. I am interested in female bloggers and matters pertaining sex. Sex is naturally a hush-hush thing for all of us. Even those that kiss and tell do have a gram of guilt that haunts them thereafter.

I will give you two situations that were discussed by these two learned friends and I. It is very thrilling, electrifying, stimulating, even invigorating for a male blogger to give an account of his chipsfunga exploits over the weekend. The conquest is applauded. He doesn’t even have to hide behind a nom de plume. However, many people would have an eeew! reaction to Zegztales. Let us talk morality first. Why? Is it because we do not ourselves indulge in irresponsible sexual behaviors? And what is responsible and irresponsible sexual behaviors these days anyway? But I digress. We will judge her and call her morally disintegrated. As @Nittzsah said, it is a society that is fond of putting people in a box and labeling them. But pray do tell, what is the difference between the two bloggers; male and female?  Does it threaten you the reader that these female bloggers are comfortable writing about sex? Something that is very much considered inviolable in our social moral zigzag?

It is often said that literature is a reflection of the society. That might pretty much explain why this is so. People are not always as comfortable talking about sex. Some words like vagina are still vestigial in the English language. I can bet the moment you read the word vagina you squirmed on my behalf. Do tell me people; why can’t a woman account her racy fantasies without being labeled as easy, imperious, morally decadent, and such? Why can’t she even fictionalize it in the comfort of her own paper and pen without you judging her? Another thing that cracks me up when it comes to sex and related prohibitions are the readers that visit the few sites I have mentioned. Most of them would rather not be associated with you even though they read your blog. They will thus leave a comment anonymously even when the comment itself has nothing in it that calls for anonymity.

I can go on and on about this…but I will only need to know one thing. Why can’t we let female writers be as naked and shameless as they want to be? Why can’t we judge both sexes of writers on the same weighing machine?