When i started being active on twitter, there was this hilarious trending topic (TT) called #youknowyouarekenyan. I saved some that i liked and they are here below.

1. If anything pisses you off and you pull out the railway lines.
2. When you use the words “and finally” during a speech and keep going for another 30 minutes
3. If you call any hot beverage tea, be it chocolate or coffee
4. If you stop in the middle of the street to drop or pick up passengers
5. When you don’t need Speed Cameras, the Potholes do the job just fine
6. If someone stops in town, points up and you look
7. If you call the watchman soldier.
8. When a dictatorial blood-soaked & out of touch former president is an ICON!
9. If you have ever said ‘Me I…’ at the beginning of a sentence.
10. If the police chief is suddenly the postmaster general.
11. When guys scram for 14 seater dirty matatus blaring vulgar music while the smart bus is clean and empty.
12. When you butt in on things you know nothing about
13. When multiple languages pop up in your sentences, for example “yawa !si i went to that ka-place kuangalia the kiria …”
14. When you say “I walked on foot”.
15. When you say “I closed my eyes and bought it”
16. When you say “I saw it with my own eyes”. Um, who else’s might you have seen it with? 🙂
17. When you call someone and first thing you say is ‘sema’ or ‘uko?’
18. If you go to church to check out chicks
19. When you like YOUR OWN facebook status updates
20. If u grew up calling the beauty salon, Saloon!
21. If you have cell phone lines you’ve never even used
22. When you see the police and you get scared despite the fact that these guys are supposedly looking out for you…
23. When the car coming at you at full speed driving on the wrong side of the road hoots at you to get out of the way!
24. If you are known by your children’s name e.g Mama Kayai, Mama Kamau
25. When rationing for water, electricity and sugar is normal.
26. When an accident occurs and instead the injured being helped they are looted.
27. If u hear a blast and instead of running away, you all run to see where it came from.

***Collected from Twitter