Baby girl,
The afandes wake us at four
In the early morning
As the familiar rumble of guts
Negotiate the murky corridors
That smell of potent body odour
I’m thinking of bacon and eggs
The scent of your sweet perfume
But my thoughts are interrupted
By the 27 men in the 2 man cell next door
They knocked over the bucket
Containing the bi-products
Of the prison’s cafeteria system
They were fighting for some part
Of some poor prisoner’s anatomy
My eyes adjust to the penetrating light
Brought about by the afande’s torch
I shiver as my face links up with the crystal cold waterdrops
From the iron bucket placed outside my exclusive cell
Afande leads us to the workshop
I standout…the trustee of the block
These hours they fly so fast
Like those Airforce jets on Kenyatta Day
I oversee my fellow mahabusu
Making number plates
For the KRA…the Arturs…Election campaigns
KCA…KCB…KCC…KCD
information stored on CD
This is no Grand Regency
But still my heart is at rest
Life is peaceful
Memories of your voice filter
They filter softly through my fibres
I’m well taken care of
Moody Hoppa at my disposal
I have inherited Tom Cholmondeley’s privilleges
Mobile phone, satellite phone, DSTV,
NTV, KTN , internet
In addition to the Holy Bible ..
.I daily read the Daily Nation
and on Friday I get my copy of The Pulse
My food I get on time…real food made real good
In the evenings..when the 27 men in the 2 man cell
Are fighting for some part of some poor prisoner’s anatomy
I’m watching PrisonBreak, Champions League football
News at nine…I’m doing fine
Having you here would make this setting so divine
I hear for just a few shillings
The afandes can organize a conjugal visit for us
So…what do you think?
If I had my way I would stay locked up forever
But thoughts of you…thoughts of you
Make me look forward to the day I leave here
I could go on and on
But this piece of paper… sadly is not enough
So when you get this..flash me…call me…email me
Whatever!
For I long to hear from you
pssst..get me that tiny lap top and a safaricom modem
smuggle them inside the large print bible..
I suddenly developed eye problems..
I can only read large print..like the bible..
Lovingly yours,
Smooth criminal
© Mike Kwambo (Read his blog here)
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9 Comments
dutchezjuma
I love this one. Kudos.
30 Sep
pajewest
I like… Smooth Criminal…
30 Sep
Bee
Great Satire…..I was laughing through the stanzas!!!
30 Sep
NJERI MAINA
I LIKE IT
1 Oct
wilson
“In the evenings..when the 27 men in the 2 man cell
Are fighting for some part of some poor prisoner’s anatomy
I’m watching PrisonBreak, Champions League football
News at nine…I’m doing fine
Having you here would make this setting so divine
I hear for just a few shillings
The afandes can organize a conjugal visit for us
So…what do you think?”
ma best stanza. i realli enjoyed it and experienced all senses in the poem
1 Oct
Chrispus
Good piece right there,so real i fee like crying! Keep it up!
2 Oct
Sanya Noel
I’m speechless on that piece, really deep.
2 Oct
Mike Kwambo
Thanks guys for all your comments. I’m glad that you were able to read between the lines and see what really goes down in Kenyan jails. Asanteni sana. This piece was second overall in the Hayfest poetry contest and I will perform this piece on Sunday 3rd October 2010 at the Storymoja Hayfest
2 Oct
Orato
FANTASTIC! The comedy in between tragedy is really brilliant. Good stuff!
10 Jan
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